Fear of Abandonment Test

The Abandonment Beliefs Self-Assessment was developed by clinicians Michelle Skeen and Wendy T. Behary in 2014 to identify and measure the primary emotional schemas that undermine adult interpersonal relationships. Grounded in schema therapy and attachment theory, the instrument focuses on early maladaptive schemas—pervasive, enduring emotional and cognitive patterns that typically originate in childhood or adolescence. When key developmental needs for emotional safety, consistent care, and mutual understanding are frustrated during early development, individuals frequently internalize negative expectations about how others will treat them. As adults, these deeply rooted beliefs operate as automatic lenses, shaping how people perceive social cues, evaluate relationship security, and respond to perceived emotional distance or conflict.

The assessment measures five distinct but interrelated facets that contribute to interpersonal insecurity. The first dimension, Abandonment Fear, reflects a pervasive dread that significant others will inevitably withdraw their affection, pass away, or abandon the relationship. This fear often manifests as hypervigilance toward perceived signs of rejection or an intense urge to cling to loved ones. The second facet, Mistrust and Abuse, involves the persistent expectation that others will deliberately inflict harm, manipulate, or betray one's trust. People scoring high in this area often maintain emotional walls, assuming that vulnerability will lead to inevitable exploitation or disappointment.

The remaining three dimensions explore related internal vulnerabilities. Emotional Deprivation represents the conviction that one's basic needs for warmth, empathy, affection, and guidance will never be met by others, frequently drawing individuals toward emotionally unavailable partners. Defectiveness centers on a painful, private sense of being fundamentally flawed, bad, or unworthy of love, which fosters intense shame and fear of being truly known. Lastly, Failure measures feelings of inadequacy regarding personal achievement, intelligence, or competence, reinforcing a belief that one does not measure up to the standards or successes of peers.

Research in clinical psychology demonstrates that unresolved abandonment schemas strongly correlate with chronic relationship dissatisfaction, attachment anxiety, and emotional reactivity. When these core beliefs are activated by relational stress, individuals often engage in counterproductive behaviors—such as excessive reassurance-seeking, jealousy, hostility, or emotional withdrawal—that inadvertently strain the very connections they wish to preserve. Developing schema awareness offers a practical foundation for breaking these repetitive cycles, fostering emotional regulation, and learning to build more secure, fulfilling interpersonal bonds.

Population comparison markers shown on the results chart are estimates, not validated percentiles. They are approximate estimates derived from published clinical literature and research sample distributions, intended to provide helpful context regarding how your scores compare to broader response tendencies; they do not represent validated, representative population percentiles or formal clinical standardizations.

This test is offered strictly for educational and self-reflection purposes and should not be used as a substitute for professional clinical advice, psychological diagnosis, or psychiatric treatment. This assessment is based on the Abandonment Beliefs Self-Assessment developed by Skeen and Behary (2014) and is not affiliated with, sponsored by, or endorsed by the original authors or copyright holders. If you find that relationship anxiety or core emotional beliefs significantly impair your well-being or daily functioning, consider reaching out to a qualified mental health practitioner.

References

• O’Connor, H. (1968). Harbinger of a New Day?. Monthly Review, 19(8), 27.